what I've learned this past week.

I need to watch my mouth that runs 1,000,000 words a minute. It acts quicker than my brain does and it bites me in the butt most of the time. I need to realize that the things I say can reveal some other sides of people. Even though some people, unfortunately, do not come with the label "CAUTION WITH YOUR WORDS, I MAY GO APESHIT ON YOU", I need to be more discerning. Alsoo! I learned to not trust people so easily. A lot of people have big mouths and once something gets out in this small, small school, it spreads like wildfire. What I told you, was to be kept between us, you shouldn't have told the whole world, even though it may benefit you. I also learned that you have ulterior motives. For some reason, I think the things you do are to benefit yourself, your popularity, your everything.

"you're a bottomless pit of me me me me me me me me me me!"

and as for you,
you talk about clothes, your future, your this and your thats, and the multiple guys that think you're cute, or just guys period, IT'S ALL ABOUT YOU. do you realize that i hardly respond to you nowadays?

I try talking to you. but what do we connect on these days? Clothes. MATERIAL THINGS. So, that's pretty much what I talk to you about.. because frankly, that's all we have to talk about.

I feel that whenever you do ask me about myself or when i tell you about my sticky situations, you just respond with a sad face or a "that sucks", it always leads back to you. SOMEWAY SOMEHOW. it's weird. It's almost a supernatural force that magnetically pulls our conversations to the shrine of You.

I don't want to be selfish and talk about myself instead. I just want things to be the way they used to be. But I guess, it was bound to happen, no?

I mean, I do love clothes and things like that, but I don't base my conversations around it. I mainly just .. blog about it! Tehehehheee

I don't want to talk to you about it, so don't come around asking me what's up. I'm too stressed out over other things at this point. I just want to blog about it and that's it. Maybe I'll confront you about it when it comes to the point where I want to strangle you.

My 100th Post

TOPSHOP! see, i told ya that i would post a pic up
love the glory days and memphis collections

Someone's taking me to Prince Edward Island after grad.

2 of my fave E&J looks.


para prom: egyptian allure?
if I go =(

yo quiero un jumpsuit.

it's spring. I need new hair. so i'm thinking ^^
but i would be soo annoyed cause it's in my face.

looks like Joe has new hair! ;) yum
HAHA! my Nick looks like a dweeb

old pic, but I love katie's new look!

i lack good pics this time. no tiempo! muchas tareas.

Spring, oh spring. I'm so excited for spring. Spring just gives me a positive outlook in life.

doing what I do best

I've been annoyed lately.

You treat me like I'm second best, like i'll always be there so you could just treat me like nothing. maybe i'm just being retarded again, but i always get that feeling. also you go and do contradicting things like that? it just makes me feel as if you've changed. i'm not liking it very much.



our friendship is hanging on a thread. i've realize that we're just superficial. what do we really talk about? like honestly. and do you really care about other things rather than.. those superficial things?



so here I am sitting the couch. it's hot as the sahara desert that's caught on fire... yet i'm wearing sweats. i feel dirty, i didn't wash my hair since yesterday morning. SAT practice test this morning. it was deadly. i know i failed. i know i did horrible. never felt so sure in my whole entire life.



to relax i'm doing what i do best. online shop =)
1) I'm loving topshops new spring/summer lookbook. i'll post a pic of it later.
2) 3 words: ELIZABETH AND JAMES
3) if i could buy an entire collection i would choose 3.1 phillip lim's
4) i want some harem pants and maybe a jumpsuit.
5) 2 words: charlotte ronson. i love her line. and her shoes? omg amazing.



so i talked to him yesterday. i made ..... progress? well i guess if that's what you call progress then so be it. he's incredibly shy, it's ridiculous! 'cause i'm super shy and if you're super shy... well it's safe to say that a negative + a negative does not equal a positive in this situation.



i think i'll be using twitter. just for fun. i made one months ago. it's easy, it's fast. okay, i don't think i'll be committed to it.

if you're looking for pictures.. well, my next blog will only consist of pictures.

Tuesday blues

I feel like going vintage shopping. Let's hit up some thrift stores, mom! Now that I think about it, i really only like shopping with my mom. I mean, I like shopping with other people too, but i feel more relaxed and free with my mom. i don't think i make ANY sense right now, but oh well. okay, with my mom... i feel as if i could express myself a lot more than with other people. idk, i get a critical vibe when i show other people what i like. and i've only really gone shopping with stephanie. HAHAH can't blame her, i like weird things. she's more.. calm than i am.


so random!


i've been kind of... annoyed lately. i feel as if i never get what i really, honestly want. the true-deep-down-in-your-heart wants. the "real" wants, not the superficial wants. wants that'll affect my life in the long run. maybe those wants aren't good for me and there's a reason for me not getting them. but it's been biting at me for a while. i know i'm being selfish and i do have many things. but these wants.. you can't buy them from a store. i work hard for them, but they just don't come. and i see other people and it's so easy for them and their lives seem so easy and i'm just like wtflipp, you know? it's so close to home, life seems like a breeze to that person and i know i'm just sitting here complaining.. and i'll stop.

sunday rose

love this West Side Story spread in VF

her dress is so pretty!

SETH! JONAH! : )

i want her accessories

“His accent and his crazy hairdo get the girls swooning. I don’t have those locks. I’m the outgoing type…Rob’s kind of shy, and he does this thing, when he’s really shy, or when someone asks him something, he lowers his head down and the girls love it!” - Kellan Lutz on Rob Patz :' )

i just love pictures, don't you?

fluorescent adolescents

I want someone to take me to see the Northern Lights.
and we'll just lay on our backs and stare up at it.


+excited for JB's next album: Lines, Vines, and Trying Times.

Update-tation

So I've been out of school for 2 days. I've never been so sick.
103.8 fever, i colllapsed on the kitchen flooor and laid their for like 2 mins or so, i feel so dizzy, it feels like I'm drunk. If you give me a small tap, I think I'll fall over. hahaha

So what have I been doing?
I slept ALL DAY Thursday. For every hour, I woke up for 5 minutes.
Watching daytime shows, I love Rachael Ray.
Online shopping
My new fave designer: Michael Williamson. Checkk itttttt
Just relaxing on my mini Spring Break.

Congrats, babygirl

I am so proud and so happy that Nina won I decided to post a blog about it. I guess all that PR, campaigning, cupcake/lollipop passing really worked. I'm sorry you were super stressed out. Heck, you made me stressed out, but I'm so glad you didn't give up. lavaaa ya <3

fluenza

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ki4sW2vvxqg

I have to watch Sunshine Cleaning.

I'm so sick right now. Every fiber of my body aches! Major headache. I feel.. well shiteous as Perez would say.


Nothing to blog about really.


: ))

91

The cross sitting on the hill
Slowly fades away
In the rearview mirror

As the lamp over my head quickly dimmers.

"God will punish you"
"God will punish you"

You in the front seat,
Crying,
Shouting,
Bawling your eyes out.

Me in the back seat,
Biting my tongue,
Gritting my teeth.

I look at you,
Tears rolling down
Your cheeks onto the steering wheel.
I look at myself,
Not a tear in sight,
My heart hardening by the second.

I wonder,
When did my heart become so cold?
When did I become so numb?

I look at you,
Tears rolling down your face.
Go ahead and cry, Ma.
You deserve it.

What's for dinner

I had McDonald's french fries for dinner, yes sir I did. indulged in all of its potato-ey, oily, and beef lard-y goodness. Reading fast food nation made me crave french fries, so on the way home, I begged my mom for a small bag. Was it worth it? Yes, despite its extra saltiness, it was made fresh! I was the first one for the new batch. HAHA, it was so faaacking unhealthy.. but it's okay. I haven't had McD's in 6 months or so.

I'm the Queen of Pansyland. Why can't I just talk to you? My words fumble over, I don't act normally, and my eyes avert to many other places EXCEPT FOR YOUR FACE. So stupid, because.. because.. well yeah. I mean I shouldn't care what you think of me, right? Right?! This is so freshman year, Andrew Vu- status.


I'm really bad at giving out advice, fyi. : ((

Firsts

First weekend in OC in a while
First time at Boiling Crab
First time taking those asian pictures

: )) I'm so happy today.


I shall write an extent blog on my successful day.

okay, SAT diagnostic test from 9-1. so stressful, long, and boring. I wanted to pull every strand of my hair out by the time we were at section 3. it was just ridiculado. i was so hungry, too! well actually steph was suffering from MAJOR hunger pains. her stomach was serenading me the whole time. BC after with emily, steph, amy, and alex. omg, i don't even know how to explain the emotions i was going through as soon as i stepped into boiling crab. ok, i'm being really dramatic right now, but it was epic. epic, i tell you! ordered 3 lbs and according to alex 3 lbs is not enough, but that's okay. i don't think you could get full from crawfish, right? I mean the meat is NOTHING. stilllll, the taste is amazing! an explosion of flavor on your tongue! such an experience. HAHA thennnn, cue pictures! so cue so cue <3 I'VE NEVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE IT. ahha! 5 little photobooths. so creative! it was pretty fun though. i have to bring stephanie, she'll loveeee it! ahah, felt bad for alex for making him wait so long. haha i guess i should of sparred him.. afterrrr, we went to steph's house, the most entertaining house in the world. HAHA. guess what steph, amy, alex, and i watched? high school reunion on tv land and reno 911. reno 911 would have to be my new favorite show. oh gosh, hilariousity at its finest.

i had a really good day <3 i love amy and stephanie!

are you there dad? it's me, victoria.

from their Fake, tight smiles,
yoU could tell this marriage was going to fail since the beginning.

I CAN'T RESIST

cheese to please

i just feel very appreciative today:

1) i love you So much! you're my bffffffffffffffffff forevereverever. honesTly, you'rE the only Person who really understands my Humor, my life, my decisions, everything. i'm glAd i met you through church. we have the same struggles and we strive for the same thiNgs. it's going to be hard, lots of pressure. but, i'll always be there for you. lIke seriously. we have to go to the MastEr's together, girl. if not life is over as i know it.

2) even though you're away in vegas, i still love youuuu and you're still considered one of my closest friends! i swear, we're so much aliKe. style, the way we talk, gnd status. oh laawwwddd, gnd. hahaha! don't woRry, we won't be gnd's forever. we're just not lIke other girlS. ya know, ya know! Thanks for always lIstening to my boriNg stories. haha! i hopE i seee you soon! ( still need to go shopping with you! and beach cruisinggg, for sure)

3) ahhhhhhhhh, this girllllll. :) we've been through A lot, no doubt. i think i've been through a lot More with You than with anyone else. but we've grown, we've matured. haha! all that's in the past. so stupid, really. buttt we're such good, no GREAT friends now! i love talking to you about everythinggggg mannngggg. thanks for texting me like crazy! man, i've never texted so much before in my whole entire life. i especially loved it when you texted me after the whole youtube scandal. thankss! (we'll most def go shopping around the world some day)

4) i've known you the longeSt. and i Think you're my inspiration! you're so wEll rounded, it never ceases to amaze me. you motivate me to do better in school cause you're so freaking smartttt. and you're always haPpy even when things are bad, you always Have A smile on your face! ahaha! thaNks for lIstening and rEading my essays AHAHA boy issues.. i go
To yoU.

5) you're like the little sister i Never had, but more. even though you're a freshIe, you give me some great advice. you're the writer of chicken soup for the victoria soul. i loveee you muchos!!! muchos muchos! you also briNg out the ghettto fab side of me. i loves it. i'm glad we're friends, i'll Always come back to la quinta for you. sigh one and a half more years to go. it's okay. we'll remain.


that rounds it up for the girls.
(my writing "skills" are not portrayed in this blog, i sound like a loser really)

completely

hehehehehehehe. misssed ya

http://www.britneyspears.com/2009/03/official-if-u-seek-amy-music-video.php

I LOVE THIS VIDEO.

more l8r!

circular

everything comes back to you. everything.

school was pretty horrible today, yeah. : (
it's ok. it's done and over with.

What happened exactly? too long to blog about.
overall, it was just stupid. so stupid.

i'm drained.


this cheered me up today:

i love my best fraaaaaaaaan cause we comment at the exact same time.
on someone else's picture. if you can't see. it's march 10, 2009 8:37 PM

macbook pro 17in :(

with that beautiful peacock feather, it's just calling to me.

blog worthy

taylor swift - you're not sorry (csi remix) is prettttty amazing.





more l8r : )

steppers

wouldn't these be sooooo sick for prom? ^^

imaginary friends

baby sitting today. es-bear and i watched veggie tales and while i was making a chef's salad and burning cookies, she was playing with her imaginary friend, nollie.

yes, that's what i said: "an imaginary friend".. i'm a bit..perplexed (yeah, that's a good word for it) but i suppose that's normal for all 5 yr olds? i don't know, if you have a 5 year old cousin or sibling, let me know. i asked her "who are you talking to?" she just gave me a dirty look.

well today i look like a lumberjack, my hair's all up, no make up. feels good, really. relaxing! i managed to finish the boy in the striped pajamas, an amazing book by the way. i recommend to all. started fast food nation, so far, so good! very interesting and trivial.

i miss shopping, I really do. spring's callin'

current obsessions:

1) who's excited for IT'S BLITZ?!
yeah yeah yeahs are backkkkkkkkkk


2) my favorite artist. Norman Rockwell

let me out of this glass box

i feel like going to TGIF's just because it's friday..


anyways, today was a drag. my mom made me bummed out this morning. she can't seem to let me go. literally and metaphorically. it bothers me soo much. and everytime she CONSTRAINS me, i just grit my teeth and bite my tongue. arguing with her is like beating a dead horse with a stick. it's useless. i'm 17 already. it's time for me to grow up.

i think being the only daughter and the oldest of all my cousins makes it difficult for my parents (which includes my uncle and aunt). i have to pave the road for my cousins. man, they owe me big time for hours and hours of sweat, pain, tears, and labor.

a lighter, more pleasant blog later.

!!!

ALEXANDER MCQUEEN
ALEXANDER MCQUEEN
ALEXANDER MCQUEEN
ALEXANDER MCQUEEN
for target

&

I HEART RONSON
I HEART RONSON
I HEART RONSON
for jcpenny!

http://www3.jcpenney.com/jcp/X6E.aspx?DeptID=50434&CatID=67861&GrpTyp=ENS&ItemID=16590ad&attrtype=&attrvalue=&CMID=EXTERNAL%7c67859&Fltr=&Srt=&QL=F&IND=3&CmCatId=external6785967861

maybe some doc martens?

oh yeah

so next year my schedule looks like:

• ap lit
• ap stats
• physics
• civics/econ (online)
• entrepreneurship
• adv photography
• pending: asb

so far, so good. pretty manageable

drained :(

The hardest thing about being home is witnessing how sick my grandmother is. Her Alzheimer's is kicking in and it's really hard and sometimes frustrating. i admit, i sometimes get mad and snap at her for constantly asking what today's date is. it's difficult when she gets up every five minutes to check up in the kitchen cause she claims that there is something unfinished and needs to be done. i have to barricade the kitchen's entrance 'cause if she starts washing the dishes or whatnot, she gets sick and her back starts hurting from standing too long at the sink. she constantly checks up on Esther because she doesn't think we're capable of watching her... which then leads to lack of sleep, which leads to her getting sick. alsoooo, i have to watch what she eats cause junk food = a no-no.

it's hard to regulate everything she does because there's a language barrier. she doesn't understand my choppy cambodian so she snaps back at me and sometimes cusses. then i get mad and snap back at her.

it hasn't been pleasant lately because i've been babysitting my aunt's home for quite a bit now. i've been getting in trouble for taking quick naps because when i do, my grandma manages to do things that can harm her.

it's hard, but i know they need my help. i love my family, i love them a lot. so i'm not complaining.. it's just.. just.. hard (for lack of a better word, lol) but that's life. and I need to suck it up! and boy, i need to work on my patience.

sorry, and thanks for listening to my rant.

Beauty in its simplest form

Just wanted to say that this past weekend was absolutely beautiful. The weather was perfect. The sun was shining. First official "summer weather" weekend. (not summer yet, just summer weather) The weather just made me such a happy camper and my happiness followed through into Monday (even though today was incredibly dreary).

and i just sound like a hippie.

Utter Randomness:

1) I wish I was able to pull off thick Vanessa Hudgens-like bangs.